the best thing is....

All of my stuff makes so much sense in my new apartment.

Seriously. This painting that my boss (from the dry cleaners)' husband did that I cajoled them into giving me because I loved it so much, that never really made sense anywhere totally makes sense in my kitchen. In fact, it's presence is the unifying factor between Hello Kitty appliances and dark green vinyl bucket seats on wheels.

And now I have four Tour Eiffel replicas. And lots of artwork. And lots of knick-knacks, and room for a table and a small desk in my kitchen. And room for all my clothes and stuff in my closet. And the second smallest bathroom in the world (the first being the bathroom that seemed to be converted from a small closet in my sister's old apartment in Glenwood, where literally, I would sit on the toilet and feel my thighs on both sides graze the walls).

I unpacked last night with a sense of glee, remembering things I'd forgotten I had, finding things I'd hoped I'd remembered to pack, and trying to figure out where I want everything to go.

I laid in my bed last night for the first time in three and a half months and I listened to the conversation of a group of people standing outside saying goodnight to someone who lived in my building. Their words muted indiscriminately so I could not hear everything but it was more so that I was back in a neighborhood where outside noises happened, and that they were pleasant and not the terrifying sounds my friend (who seemed to be channelling Chicken Little's spirit for the last week) claimed I would hear.

I slept restlessly and awoke before my alarm. I worry that I may have gotten used to the feeling of sleeping on a couch, feeling that support that falsely resembles the body of your lover at night, sidled up against you as close as can be.

I had resolved not to go to class today, that it was too important to finish unpacking and get myself situated, but then I realized that right now, school is more important. The train ride in this morning was long, but I had a seat, and a book to read, so it was tolerable. And I was on time. There's some kind of phenomenon that the closer you are to some place, the later you'll be. I even had time to buy coffee and a donut at the nearby Dunkin Donuts.

thanks for all of your cheerleading. i don't think I could have gotten through the last few months without some support and knowing you were there mattered.

stine