as the relationship turns...

Many of you have been wondering how life with Eric is going (or, if not, I am going to talk about it anyway, so read or not read...) :

Our trip to the Cape was lovely. His family was amazingly kind and generous, and I had so much fun. They are a wonderful bunch of people and I really adore them. Eric and I had some nice quiet moments together, including walks to the beach; once we saw the moon half full and harvesting, it was beautiful hovering at horizon's edge along the water. Everyone helped me with a homework assignmment I had for PhotoI, which was to take A-Z pictures of one subject. I chose Cape Cod, figuring I could do it there. Now I realize, any number of things could have happened to my film and I can't go back there to shoot...but oh well, everything turned out fine. At one point, Eric's dad pulled the car over and parked while I shot the sign for the Zooquarium. Z! I think Eric and I really needed the vacation from our lives and we returned with renewed and refreshed feelings towards each other.

What has really been making a huge difference for us is the mandatory date night once a week. We go out, have dinner, hang out, talk, and actually enjoy each other's company. It feels like we get to have each other all to ourselves, and we enjoy our time. I think the date I liked most was when I met Eric near Broadway and Diversey, we went shopping for a bit and then stopped at La Creperie and had a lovely meal, then walked home along the dark streets feeling wonderful. We didn't plan a thing! I didn't try to make a plan either! There was also a really low-key date where we just went to the local thai place and then to the moon bar, and then played cribbage for a long time.

We've begun to reach a certain kind of understanding towards each other that is comforting and easy and makes for less bumps in the road. For instance, we both have busy lives and often conflicting schedules. I tend to overschedule, he tends to underschedule. Maybe that's the way of all women and men. But when I am busy doing something and he feels left out, he tells me so, or vice versa, and then we actually do something about it right then, instead of getting mad and wishing the other person would just leave us alone. Also, I've made some compromises. I've cut some of the busy out, so that there would be more time for us. And there's definite days that are solely ours, like the date night, so we can look forward to it and not feel cheated about never seeing each other.

Lately, we've been playing this game of thinking up once nice thing to do for each other. Sometimes it's daily, sometimes every other day, but it's just kinda fun. I got Eric this cool Photography magazine, he made me mini-no pudge-brownies. Just thoughtful things that don't take too much time (though the brownies took maybe a little more time) and we get to show it to each other rather than assume the other person should know by now.

Also, there is talk about the future. I know. Crazy. My roommate's on a five year plan and this is the end of year two. She wants to get her own place with her boyfriend (who is Eric's best friend) so our happy little home will be disbanded. There is talk about Eric and I moving in together, which not too long ago would have really been crazy, but is starting to seem like it might be our chance to actually be together. There's something about living with another couple that just totally interferes in our relationship (of course, it doesn't help that I have beefs about them). Part of me feels like I owe it to Eric for turning his life upside down and inside out to giving him a chance for what life could be like when there is just us. There has always been them, especially since I moved in here over a year ago, but when I had my own place, things were heavenly...we had freedom to be ourselves and that made us much more happy around each other.

The funny thing is, I have no problems with living with Eric. He's a little sloppy, but in a similar way to me. Things pile up and then one day it's too much and it has to get cleaned. I just have a lower tolerance for the piles and it takes less days for it to annoy me. He cooks, I wash dishes. I do laundry, which I am totally anal about, he keeps the clothes over there, and not all over the floor. We love my big bed and he loves my decorating panache. I think he could be doing more things with his time, rather than watch tv all night, but that's his thing to sort out, not mine.

So I guess things with Eric and I have been the best they can be, for the situation we're in. It's hard, I know, for all the people who love me and want the world for me to sit idly by and deal with my complacency about it. This is as good as it's gonna get, for right now. There's a certain damper that we constantly have over us from living in the apartment with our roommates. I met them on our first date. I kinda had a feeling of what I was in for. But I think if we take a chance of living together without them, I might find that man I found when our relationship first began, a strong, vibrant, eclectic, god-like man on earth, who makes me feel like the world was made just for us to find each other.

If I don't, trust me, you'll be the first to know and hear about it.